Monday, March 10, 2008

Expectation

Expectations are something that I am not sure of, where to fit them in.
Can I expect something or anything of anybody or may be only of myself?
It is up to me to live up to my own expectations.
If necessary, I have to change my attitude towards something or somebody in order to live up to my own expectations.
My question is, can I expect something from the other, just because that is something that I might have done in his or her place?
My answer is no, a definite “no”.
What I do or how I behave is entirely up to me. But why should I expect the same behavior of the other?
When I encounter the other, I do so for the sake of the encounter. I want to get to know him or her, hear his or her views, but at the same time remain myself, just as he or she does. The fact that we meet does not mean that the other or myself have to change our attitudes or our views nor his or her behavior..

The behavior of the other may be the last thing that I expected of him or her. But I am not responsible for the behavior of the other.

In other words, expectations I should turn inwards, towards myself, but not towards the other.

2 comments:

Henry Kosak said...

Dear Ester,
It is wonderful to hear from you - I just had the feeling to check your name in the internet. Then I saw your blog. I assume you don't know who I am/we are. But you've been in our home in Cottbus, Germany - and we visited you in your home in Israel 1997. We're the Kosak family, living since two years in Moscow/Russia. Still I keep your marvelous book in my hands. I hope there would be a chance to meet you again!!! We wish you all the health and joy you need. The Kosak's

Ester Golan said...

Lieber Henry,
ich erinnere mich sehr gut an eure Gastfreundschaft bei meinen Aufenthalt in Cottbus. Wie viele Jahre liegt das zurueck?
Unterdessen bin ich um einiges aelter geworden. Ich halte weiterhin Vortraege und bin aktiv im inter-religioesen und inter-kulturellen Dialog. Man muss sich kennenlernen, egal wie unterschiedlich man denkt. Letztendlich ist genug Platz fuer uns alle auf Gottes Erden.
Als mein Mann 1995 starb zog ich von Haifa nach Jerusalem, da dort mein Sohn lebt, der mir im Alter und kuerzlich bei meiner Operation eine grosse Stuetze ist.
Was macht ihr in Moskau? Planed ihr eine reise nach Jerusalem?
Alles gute
gruesse aus Jerusalem
Shalom
Ester